So I’m not going to lie. I started this quest to read Twilight on a bit of a vendetta. I was reading it so I could trash it with impunity. Those who have voted can bash the president, those who have read Twilight can bash Cullens (only, not physically, cause I admit that I’d get owned). If I got in a couple digs along the way, all the better! But as I read it, I found myself enjoying certain parts. The conclusion was especially satisfying (if you missed that post: STUFF BLOWS UP!!!). And along the way I gained some respect for Ms. Meyer as an author.

Note that I said some. I’m not putting Ms. Meyer on the same level as the masters, current literary novelists, or even other current YA novelists. She uses the talent she has to the best of her ability, and produces a decent story (and several bazillion dollars).

I don’t want to go into “why girls like Twilight.” If you do, I would suggest (not recommend, but suggest) the Oatmeal’s take on it. He does a pretty decent job. He also says a lot of things that Laura would tell me are “inappropriate” and “demeaning to readers of Twilight,” mostly because they’re inappropriate and demeaning to readers of Twilight. But it’s funny. Read at your own risk?

Ms. Meyer succeeded by creating quite possibly the most accessible fantasy world of all time. The universe of Twilight is as far-fetched as the Star Wars universe, in that the things that happen in each would never, ever happen in the real world. Even with the vampirism removed, the central romance of Twilight is about as realistic as a lightsaber. We wish it could happen, and we see things in this world that are really close to it, but there’s just no way we’d ever be able to have that happen.

Do I want to be a jedi? Oh heck yes. Do people want to have an Edward in their lives? Oh heck yes. Will either of these things happen? No, because I’m too old to join the Jedi Academy. And Edward’s taken.

But Ms. Meyer’s success is that it’s way easier to see Twilight happening than even Smallville, Alias, or Spider-man (other “normal person finds themselves wrapped up in enormous excitement” stories). And you say, “well duh, because Bella doesn’t really have powers, and so she’s normal, and people relate,” and so on and so on. I agree entirely, and would gently remind you that Ms. Meyer made a conscious decision to write it that way. She invented the story in a way people would relate to it. Is that not what all authors should want to do?

It’s not bad to enjoy these stories, as long as we remember that these stories are stories. They could never happen. When people start to blur the lines between fantasy and reality, even in subtle ways, that’s when fanboys and fangirls happen. That’s when things get weird. Do we dream of going to Hogwarts? Yes. Do we expect to go there? No. The danger of Twilight is those who would answer yes to both of those questions in relation to Forks. (sidenote: Alan Hussey can tell you how boring Forks actually is. You don’t want to go there)

So I’m forced to say that Twilight has excellent world-creating and plotting. Now, I am not forced to say anything good about the dialogue and prose of the piece, which are abysmal. The excellent world-creating compensates for the inability to actually have her characters talk like normal people. Also, I will never forgive her for describing Edward in obnoxiously repetitive detail. It made me want to punch his perfect, glittering face.

All things considered, I would give this book a C+. Seeing as I went in determined to give it an F–, this is a significant improvement on what I imagined.

Next week: I’m reviewing the Twilight movie. Oh snap.